Apr 09 2008
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Mitch Hedberg Quotes
“Fettucini alfredo is macaroni and cheese for adults.”
“I don’t have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who’d be mad at me for saying that.”
“I had a stick of CareFree gum, but it didn’t work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality.”
“My belt holds my pants up, but the belt loops hold my belt up. I don’t really know what’s happening down there. Who is the real hero?”
“Y’know, you can’t please all the people all the time… and last night, all those people were at my show.”
[via: peterwknox]